i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
