tell your sister to shave her snatch
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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