I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
