end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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