And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
The power of my boobs compel you
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize