new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
