Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
