I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
