So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
