She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
