what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
