Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
