We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize