after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Sober January is a disaster.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
