what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I want her autograph on my taint
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
