This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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