But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
