is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
