Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i love accidental penises.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
please don't ironically join a cult
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