and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
