Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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