we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
