evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
