bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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