Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
my poor anus
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
