He kissed a someone with a penis
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
