She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
