there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
