I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
