She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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