I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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