ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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