I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Your tits are I can't wait for
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
