Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Do vagina's smell?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
