All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
