Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Still dying that you shit outside
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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