Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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