I just made out with a guy for $7.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
