If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Randomize
