I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Say something about gay babies.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Randomize
