i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
