The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
