just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
