i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
My pussy is not your playground.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
