Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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