You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
