could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Your penis caused this!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
