worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
