Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
It's like God shit irony all over that family
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
