Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
